She DOES get it
by sdykikyou
Summary: Maybe Brittany understands more than she lets on. Just a late night brainwave I had. Close-but-not-quite angsty Brittana. T for implied femmslash. Reviews are always appreciated!


**All righty, now. First Glee fic, so be nice, please~! Now, I obviously don't own Glee, or there are SOOOO many things that would be different about it… That out of the way. I remembered the little thing Brit let slip when the Glee members were on the big conference call while I was watching "Hell-O", and though I don't actually ship Brittana, this is the idea that came to me. **

"God, Brit, why are you always leaving me to clean up your messes?" Santana demands the moment the door to Glee club and their unnecessary drama closes. "I can't believe you'd be stupid enough to say something like that to them. Do you know what that could have done to me?"

Brittany recognizes that this is Santana's "I'm angry so I'm saying it now but I'll make up for it later" voice, and therefore only lets her smile falter a tiny bit. She'd never let on how much it hurts when Santana yells (or in this case, whisper-yells) at her for doing something stupid. It's not that she doesn't understand: she just didn't mean to. Still, she feels like she deserves the yelling on some level.

"Sorry, Santana. It just kind of came out of my mouth, like word insomnia. I didn't mean to…" She replies. Santana rolls her eyes angrily. Brittany realizes the extent of how angry Santana is when she doesn't get a slight smile or even a correction for her mistake. She knows she's not the sharpest tool in the drawer, but even when she knows it, she'll let a mistake slip out every once in a while on purpose just because it makes Santana a little friendlier, a little happier, a little more indulgent when she corrects it. It's not that she doesn't understand, it's just that, well, part of her (a big part) wanted to say it for a lot longer than this. And while she didn't say it on purpose, she didn't regret it as much as Santana wanted her to once they'd hung up.

"Brittany, you just don't understand. _I'm_ the top dog around here now. I'm head of the Cheerios, and you're so close to breaking that for me. Don't you like being on top of the group instead of being second best to Quinn?" Brittany wants to cut in that she feels like she's traded one leader for another, but she bites her tongue. Santana's voice takes on a slightly twisted quality, a blend of patronization, sarcasm and false hope. It's something she's heard others use on her and Santana use on others, but never her. Never Santana.

"Brit, hun. You know I love you, but look around. We're in _Ohio_. We'd never last if we actually came out as a couple. Sue wouldn't take another look at me, and where would we be? Slushied, just like the rest of the losers in Glee club. I'm doing this to help us, to keep us on top of the social ladder, right where we should be. You know something? People say that they like gay guys and lesbians, but what they really want is something that seems forbidden but still accessible at the same time. That's why we have to stick to our story, and what everyone thinks. We're not actually together—we're just doing it for the guys so that they'll sleep with us and we stay cool. Got it?" Santana smiles slightly and Brittany can't help but smile back and nod slightly. "Good. Now, I'm going to go to the bathroom and then the cafeteria. You coming?"

Brittany shakes her head. "I have to go do something…I'll just meet you there in a few." Santana doesn't seem to notice her mood, which Brittany is grateful for as Santana kisses her cheek and walks off, leaving Brittany leaning against the wall.

It's not that she doesn't understand. She gets why Santana needs to keep her reputation. It's to help the two of them survive this place until they can get somewhere where they can be accepted.

But why does she still feel so miserable?

**Now, I don't know if I wrote Santana OOC, but I definitely feel like Brittany picks up on more than she lets on, even if she really is that stupid sometimes. Anyhow, moving on. Reviews would be nice, please and thank you. :D**


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